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The Ramblings of a Grey Man

Friday, June 15, 2007

If I knew last night was going to be the last night I ever had on this earth, I would have arranged to not wake up. Probably not, in all honesty, but it is a comforting thought in this new era and age.

Today began like a day, like any other day. I woke up, checked my mail, and put Buffy in the dvd player. With the move, I find myself with a little bit of downtime, so I have been re-watching the series, thanks to the power of DVD's. Kind of good timing, if you think about it, really. It is like watching a "How To" instructional video. But I digress. I sat around, watching my Buffy, and the world was good. I have gone through a big change in my life, putting myself in a proverbial cocoon. Sadly, I was forced to emerge a lot sooner than I intended.

I thought everything was fine and normal. Buffy was keeping me entertained, and the dog of the house was relaxing in my chair. There were a few people in and out of the house today, so it really was a day like any other. The time came for me to head to work, so I geared up. I put my work clothes in my backpack, as always, and plugged my cell into one ear, and a PSP full of music into my other. As I filled up my bottle of water upstairs for the bike ride, I glanced out the window, and there was just something in the air, something I felt, but did not know. I shrugged it away, blaming it on Buffy, hopped on my bike, and off I went. Soon after that was when the world changed.

The area near the place where I am staying does not normally see a lot of traffic, so I paid the lack of traffic no mind. Down the hill I went, racing at a fast pace, rounded the last corner to work, and there it was: The End of the World. A lot of people thought it was not going to be until the year 2012. Boy, were they wrong. Smoke columns plumed into the sky, and the building that was my work place burned with a fiery grace, that only a pizza place could burn.

I looked around at the carnage, and surprisingly did not feel panic: what with the cars on their sides, bodies laying everywhere, the smell of death and what not. All I could feel was the need to find survivors. I had no idea what happened, and honestly I still don't. Rumors say it was a virus, while others say Hell closed its gates. Regardless the reason, turmoil was put on the menu, and everyone was forced to eat it.

Quickly I raced up the hill on my bike, using as much strength as I could, knowing any moment could be my last. I made my way to the ash that used to be my work, and found someone. Well, I thought I did anyways. It was my coworker, Andy, a nice young lad with a good attitude. One of his arms had been ripped off, and blood was everywhere. As I found myself getting closer to him, I saw that he was dead. My first, and only mistake of the day. I just kind of sat there for a second, observing his body, when out of nowhere he began to move, reanimated. When he finally lifted his head, and his eyes met mine, I knew instantly what was going on.

You see, when you are raised in such a morbid culture as ours, things like zombies are everyday conversation. Hell, there is even a Zombie Survival Guide, something we now call the bible. Yes, Tommy, you were right all along. So, when I was facing my former coworker, and instead found myself facing a Zombie, I froze. This moment in which we were all waiting for, and I froze. Zombie Andy bounded up from the ground and began to come towards me, and all I could do was sit there. I always thought they would be faster, after watching recent movies. Moments before he was close enough to grab me with his one remaining arm and sink his teeth into me, I awoke from my coma, and hit the road.

What was I to do? Where was I to go? The world was coming to and end, and I did not know what I could do to help. All I could think of was returning home, and trying to get in touch with the loved ones before it was too late. Too late. Was I too late? Was everyone already dead? I would have my answer soon enough.

On the way home, things had time to get a little crazier as I took an alternate route home, out of habit. As I came up the first of three big hills, I saw two of them, attacking a small boy. He was trying to run from them, but for some reason these could run at high speeds. Maybe they had just been awake longer, I really do not know. I debated trying to intervene, but as soon as I had the thought, they began to feast upon the poor child. Yeah, he could not have been more than eight, but there I was, watching this kid get eaten alive. It was only a few moments, in all honesty, before he stopped screaming.

By this point, I had no choice. I had to get home. I left the duo and their lunch, and continued my journey. There were attacks going on everywhere. At one point, I found myself getting chased by one while I rode my bike. Those of you who have ever biked near a dog will know the feeling. Truly terrifying, despite loving dogs. What was normally a fifteen minute bike ride, then took forty-five. I had to dodge packs of them, not like big packs mind you, but more like groups of four to five. Right before I made it to my place, it hit me. Would I be safe there?

I bolted into the driveway, and luckily none of them were near it. In fact, the last couple of blocks before it held none of them at all. For now I had my peace. The dog, though, was nowhere to be found. My room is ground floor, behind the house, and the only thing separating me from the outside world is two glass doors. I know my time here is limited, so I type this message in the hopes you get it. Do what you can to stay alive. Do not be alone, and do not approach anything that looks dead. Seek the high ground, and protect your loved ones and yourself. I know it is the End of the World, but we have to last. We will find a way to survive. We always do. Oh, there is the dog, sitting outside my door. I wonder where it has been.

Oh no fucking way!



Because I feel this is a better narrative than a story, I got a wild hair and decided to make a recording of it.

I have two versions:
The First One, with just me reading the story
The Second Version, complete with many cheesey sound effects

Tell me which version you think is better! Dial-Uppers (Do you still exist?) Beware!
posted by Crispy  # 9:37 AM
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posted by Crispy  # 9:35 AM

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